Running BLogs..

I've been doing a lot of reading of other runners blogs. I have yet to find someone at the same place as I am in running. Maybe that's a good thing.. most of these blogs are written by women in their mid 30's and run a lot faster. They do 1/2 marathons and full marathons by the dozens, like it's nothing. I don't need to find another me on the Internet, but someone with similar goals and struggles would be nice.

I always go thought a lot of self doubts.. I want to run.. I don't want to run.. or race. Competition is always a bit nerve wracking. I put too much pressure on myself to always improve and win. Winning means, winning at what ever you set your goals to be for that particular race. My goals change for races, but in the end.. it's always about competition with others.. being the best I can be and pushing myself out of my comfort zone. It's exciting and scary.. I'm always happy I did what I set out to do and conquer my fears, because that's all it is.. I'm really only competing with myself at each and every race. To improve my fitness.. push myself and do something I would have never done 2 years ago..

Sometimes.. I need a little reminder.. It's okay to be nervous.. it will be over soon and I will once again feel great about just having done a race. I need races to monitor my improvements and to push myself or I'd never change. It's getting harder and harder to notice changes in the right direction. I don't see huge leaps and bounds in my fitness like I use to. While I dread the wait of the race.. I also look forward to it..

I did the smart thing. took the morning off from running and instead just lifted weights for 30 minutes. I did not do any leg weights.. don't need to make those sore or tired.

My race is at 2pm.. I'll be able to sleep in tomorrow.. spend all morning being nervous.. and go to the race by 12:30.. get there by 1pm.. check in.. stand around.. wait, wait.. run at 2.. 4 miles.. I hope to finish around 30-31 minutes.. 29 would be really great!

I don't know the race route.. I have heard its not very hilly.. but I won't really know till I run it... It's going to be chilly tomorrow 40's.. need to check for wind..

My reward.. hum...?? I'm hoping just a metal or ribbon.. a place in my age group 1 -4th!